A Record of Five Decidedly Un-Remuslike Moments
by lumoscrimsom
Summary: 'As a child, Remus John Lupin had always been able to control himself better than most adults could ever hope to, but after that fateful (and frankly, damning) day on the Hogwarts Express, Remus John Lupin's control was broken down piece by piece until he was just as mad as the other Marauders.'


**Disclaimer:** The characters aren't mine, but Remus's stupid behaviour is.

**A/N: **Yes, I know I should be writing my chaptered fics, but I needed a break.

**Beta:** agentrock – thanks for the awesome job!

**A Record of Five Decidedly Un-Remuslike Moments**

As a child, Remus John Lupin had always been able to control himself better than most adults could ever hope to. His being a raving beast once a month probably had quite a bit to do with it, but he always liked to tell people that he was just a naturally calm person. Life was good. No one attempted to pry or ask him questions about things that were his business – until he met a certain trio of eleven year boys. Yeah, that was the day everything went down the bloody pot. After that fateful (and frankly, damning) day on the Hogwarts Express, Remus John Lupin's control was broken down piece by piece until he was just as mad as the other Marauders.

MOMENT NUMBER ONE: Werewolves of Scotland

EMOTION RELEASED: Panic

TIME AND PLACE: Third year, dormitory

REASON FOR EMOTION: _See below_

Remus had been having a perfectly good day for several reasons: there had been sausages left at breakfast by the time he had arrived; Professor McGonagall had set them a nice, long essay on animagi; his favourite table in the library had been free at lunch. _Yes_, Remus thought with an inward smile as he ascended the stairs to the dormitory, a mug of steaming hot chocolate in one hand and a dog-eared edition of 'The Lord of the Rings' in the other, _it has been a perfectly good day, hasn't it?_

Little did he know, his friends were waiting in the dormitory to ambush the poor boy and ruin his perfectly good day. Remus pushed the door open with his hip and hummed happily as he entered the dorm, looking forward to changing into his pyjamas and settling under his covers for a nice early night of magic rings and sweet chocolate drinks – only to let loose a suspiciously girly shriek and jump backwards when he was met with the 'surprise' inside.

"What's up with him?" Peter frowned as the distinct sounds of a petrified Remus falling down the stairs floated up into the dorm. The pudgy boy sighed in annoyance and laid down his picket fence sign which proudly announced in glittery pink paint, 'WE KNOW YOUR SECRET'.

"Honestly, he calls _us_ drama queens!" James exclaimed, throwing his hands up and slicing his bed hangings in the process with his silver sword. Peter nodded, glancing at his sign with another sad sigh.

"Can't do anything for anyone these days," Sirius observed wisely, silencing the record player in the corner. Silence reigned in the dorm once Werewolves of London had stopped playing and the three boys listened for any life outside. Sirius stepped towards the door tentatively, "Is he dead? Merlin, I can't go to Azkaban! I'm too pretty."

"He's not dead." James scoffed cheerfully, prancing past Sirius to skip down the stairs. Moments later, he returned with a disorientated Remus wrapped around his waist as he heaved their friend up into the dorm. "Right, stay right there." James ordered, closing the door for safety measures before hurrying back to his position and gesturing manically for the other two to do the same.

Meanwhile, there was a conference going on in Remus's brain. Having been unconscious for the better part of five minutes – collapsed at the foot of the stairs in the common room in a heap that apparently no one had bothered to investigate – he had missed most of his internal discussion. All he knew, as he came back to the world of the conscious, was that he was somehow up in the dormitory in a puddle of hot chocolate that was threatening to burn a hole in his left arse cheek. That, and his subconscious was screaming for him to RUN YOU STUPID GIT, RUN.

Maybe his friends would see his disorientation and decide to spare him from whatever had caused him to fall down the stairs and lose twenty seconds of his memory. He probably had a concussion, actually. If he didn't go to Madam Pomfrey now, who knew? He might end up an invalid forever. Remus's more sensible half dismissed that thought with a scoff but admitted that a much needed trip to the hospital would be a brilliant excuse to escape whatever scarring vision his friends were about to bestow upon him.

"Surprise!" Sirius sang, recapturing Remus's dazed attention. The music started up again and Remus froze, sat in a puddle of hot (seriously, hot) chocolate, staring at the show his friends were putting on. Peter was dancing around in what looked like a toga made from the curtains, bobbing a picket fence sign up and down – was that glitter? James and Sirius were duelling with silver swords and singing boisterously to the lyrics of 'Werewolves of London'. Remus's mind was spinning, he felt sick, a grey haze descended over his eyes. Why had he been born with such bad luck? What did this cruel world have in store for him next? What had he done to deserve this?

Climbing to his feet shakily, Remus caught the eyes of the frolicking boys. They instantly stopped their revelry, lowering their respective signs and swords as they looked warily at their friend. Remus, usually so composed and calm, was clutching at his hair with wide eyes as he looked about the room as if for an exit.

"What am I going to do?" Remus asked in a high pitched, breathy voice, "No! This can't be happening, it can't!" The other boys glanced at each other in concern and started towards their friend as he started to shake his head quickly. "No, no, no!" Remus moaned, "They're going to send me to the farm! Yes, the farm! I always knew my pets were dead when she told me she'd sent them to the farm and I'm next—"

"Remus, your mother isn't going to kill you because we found out about your lycanthropy." James said gently, his voice deliberately slow and calming in case he upset their friend again. Remus spun around, staring at his friends with wide, crazed eyes.

"Not that, you idiots," he hissed, "I don't give a donkey's arse about that."

"Then what—?" Sirius started warily.

"The book." Remus wailed, "It was 'The Lord of the Rings'! My mum's favourite book and I've lost it!"

"You took it with you when you fell down the stairs." Peter informed him matter-of-factly. Remus paused, looking at him for a moment, before relaxing and turning to leave the dorm in search of his coveted book. The Marauders who were left blinked dumbly, staring after their friend.

"We need to start hiding his books." Sirius said after a moment, receiving appreciative nods and agreements as they started to clean up their wasted presentation and switch the record to 'Seaside Rendezvous'.

MOMENT NUMBER TWO: Green-Eyed Monster

EMOTION RELEASED: Jealousy

TIME AND PLACE: Forth year, library

REASON FOR EMOTION: _See below_

Remus was feeling…odd. Yes, yes, that was certainly the right word for it. Maybe. How was he to know? He had never felt anything like it before, so how was he supposed to identify this gnawing, burning, churning sensation right down deep in the pit of his stomach when—

Yep, there they go again, he thought, narrowing his eyes as Sirius moved in for the forty thousandth kiss that day. Sitting on the sofa opposite James and Remus in front of the fire in the common room was Sirius and his first girlfriend. They had been stealing kisses, touches and love sick glances all night and Remus had been feeling sick to his stomach for approximately the same amount of time, hiding behind his astronomy textbook as he watched them.

"Seems happy, doesn't he?" James asked suddenly, making Remus jump guiltily and lift his book up to hide his face.

"Yes, of course," Remus said quickly, hoping that James couldn't see his blush and ask him about it– because, for Merlin's sake, he didn't know why it was there either. "Marvellous. Just…fabulous…"

"Fabulous?" Peter repeated with a snort from the floor. "You doing okay, Moony?"

"Just fabul— um, just fine, thanks." Remus mumbled, snapping his book shut. The sound attracted the attention of Sirius and his girlfriend. Remus gulped when Sirius looked at him and gave him a concerned frown.

"Alright, Moony?" he asked kindly. Remus could only let out a strangled groan that sounded something like, 'yesI'mperfectlyfinewhywouldn'tIbeyoustupidgirlyfa cesuckingprick?' earning himself an amused head tilt from his best friend before he went back to snogging the air from his girlfriend's lungs. It looked horribly unpleasant in Remus's opinion, and he felt incredibly sorry for her. Yes, that sounded about right.

"You wanna know what I think?"

Remus jumped guiltily – what was with all this guilt? He wasn't doing anything wrong – and looked at James with a reproachful frown. "Not really, but you're going to tell me anyway. Go ahead."

"I think you're jealous." James grinned, his eyes glinting behind his glasses. Remus blinked, his mind going blank for a moment before a rush of emotions and thoughts flooded through, none of which changed his blank expression. _Jealous_, he thought after a long moment – during which James had been watching him in concern, assuming that his friend had fallen into some sort of coma – _that makes sense_.

"Thanks, Prongs," Remus smiled in relief at his friend. "Now that I know I can do something about it. I think I'll do it right now, actually."

James's expression fell and he shook his head frantically. "Moony…uh, don't you think you should wait until he's at least broken up with her first? You know I'm all for it, but you can't just get in the middle of them," he hissed, glancing over at Sirius and his girlfriend to check whether they were still too attached at the lips to notice their whispered conversation.

"What are you talking about?" Remus asked, not noticing how James's face fell, "I don't want Sirius's girlfriend."

"I know!" James sighed, massaging his temples in an effort to stay patient. "You want Si—"

"I'm going to the library." Remus announced suddenly, rising and setting his book down beside his bag. James watched in despair as his lycanthropic friend marched from the common room determinedly, leaving his bag and his robes behind. Such carelessness was not like Remus and James might have been able to blame that on his confusion about Sirius…but, of course, the boy didn't even seem to realise the truth even when James was handing it to him on a bloody silver platter.

"Moony still hasn't realised that he wants Padfoot's cock?" Peter asked airily from the floor, where he was playing with a couple of particularly angry chess pieces.

"Nope," James sighed. "Obviously he hasn't noticed that he sighs Padfoot's name in his sleep."

"Well, duh. He's asleep, you arse." Peter snickered.

"What was that about my cock?" Sirius asked from the other sofa as his girlfriend got up to go and giggle with her giggly girl friends. The remaining two Marauders exchanged glances.

"Just saying how disappointed whatshername is gonna be when she sees it." James smirked, inwardly priding himself on his quick thinking. Sirius roared and leapt at his best friend playfully. Neither boy noticed that Peter had been knocked unconscious by Sirius's knee on his way over.

Meanwhile, Remus had found what he was looking for in the library. Sarah Pryce from Ravenclaw was waiting in the line by Madam Pince's desk to take a book out – his friends had been telling him for months that she obviously liked him, so why was he acting like a complete virgin and avoiding her? To which, of course, Remus had responded that "Yes, he was a virgin and so were they, so look up some better insults. Idiots."

Since Remus was jealous of Sirius for having a girlfriend, the only solution was to get one for himself. He was fourteen, so it was time, right? Right? Sarah was perfect – she already liked him, so it shouldn't be too hard. She was already waving at him from the line. Taking a deep breath, Remus walked over to her and smiled, imagining that it was a winning grin like the one Sirius pulled off so easily. It probably turned out more like a paedophile's smarmy smirk, but he didn't know that, so it was fine.

"Hullo, Remus!" Sarah greeted him happily. Remus rubbed the back of his neck nervously and closed his eyes. This wasn't as easy as he had first thought. Maybe…maybe if he did it with his eyes shut, it wouldn't be as awkward? Yes, the logic was flawless, he would do that. However, what with his vision being compromised, Remus wasn't aware that one of Sarah's friends had called her over to talk and she had left after taking a brief, uncomfortable glance at him and his closed eyes.

Keeping his eyes screwed tightly closed, Remus took another deep breath and said, "I just wanted say that I, err, think you're really…pretty? Yeah, pretty, and I- I wanted to ask if you would like to…oh Merlin…if you wanted to go out? With me, that is."

There was a collective gasp in the library and Remus froze, wondering if he had somehow done something drastically wrong. He opened his eyes and swore under his breath. Now, normally Madam Pince would berate him for using offensive words, but at that moment she was far too taken aback by Remus asking her out to notice.

"Oh," Remus squeaked, "I'm sorry, Madam Pince, I didn't realise—"

"Reeeemuuuuss!" the young librarian squealed, throwing her hands up and jumping up and down in excitement, "Of course I'll go out with you!"

"Yes, I—" Remus paused, taking a step back, "Wait, what?"

"I said yes." Pince grinned manically, hopping over her desk as Remus walked backwards towards the exit slowly, trying not to startle her lest she attack. "Dumbledore won't be happy, but I'm sure he could make an exception for our looove, right, Remmypoo?"

Remmypoo.

Remmy.

Poo.

That was the last straw. With a strangled yelp, Remus turned tail and ran for all he was worth, the crazed librarian chasing him as she recited poems of love to him. He reached Gryffindor Tower, screaming the password to the Fat Lady's portrait as he approached, and leapt through into the common room.

"Help!" he panted as he stumbled and tripped, falling to his knees in his exhaustion.

"Please…help…Pince…crazy!"

"Did you get a girlfriend, Moony?" James asked lazily, dealing another round of cards to him, Peter and Sirius, oblivious to the school librarian throwing herself on top of Remus and the rest of the common room's shocked stares. He only glanced over to see Remus struggle to stop Pince from planting red kisses all over his face when a camera flash went off and smiled in approval, "Oh, congrats."

MOMENT NUMBER THREE: A Fabulous Affair

EMOTION RELEASED: Denial

TIME AND PLACE: Fifth year, Great Hall

REASON FOR EMOTION: _See below_

Life was not good. No. Nope. No way.

And why not? Well, because Remus's crotch was insisting that life was fabulously good whilst he stared at his best bloody friend's arse. So, to make things more clear: everything below his belt was having a whale of a time, whilst everything above his neck was horrified. The stuff in between was pretty much indifferent.

_Okay_, he thought stubbornly, concentrating on his dinner in front of him instead of Sirius' arse as it wiggled around in front of him, _stop thinking about such things and don't panic. Remember the last time you panicked?_ Remus shuddered, recalling the 'Lost Book and Hot Chocolate Burnt Arse Cheek Incident'. No, panicking was definitely not a good idea. It was Sirius's fault, really, so he shouldn't be getting so worked up; if the boy would just sit the fuck down and stop trying to catch some girl's attention over at the Hufflepuff table, then Remus wouldn't have his _delectable-firm-sexy_ arse in his face.

Merlin, was he in trouble.

He couldn't be gay. He was straight. Yep, straight. Had been ever since he could remember. The fact that he had pushed his only girlfriend away when she had tried to touch him meant nothing. Maybe he just wasn't attracted to thirty year old librarians. Nothing wrong with that.

Looking around the Great Hall, he desperately searched the place for a girl – any girl – that he was attracted to more than that _delicious-round-sensual_ arse right next to his face. Then Sirius turned around – and suddenly Remus couldn't look at the sausages on his plate – to wave to someone entering the hall. Remus turned too, willingly distracted from the disturbingly phallic-shaped food on his plate, to see James coming over with a bounce in his step.

Remus's eyes focused on a certain redhead a few paces behind James and his mind went on overdrive as it worked out a solution to its _mouth-watering-temping-arousing_ problem. Blanking out James's excited babble to Sirius and Sirius's excited congratulations – for what? – Remus got to his feet and grabbed Lily's wrist as she slowed to talk to James and Sirius. He realised that Lily stopping to talk to them was odd, but he was running on refutation and ignoring all logic. Using the moment of his mental confusion to take the leap, he pressed his mouth against Lily's. To his chagrin, his body did nothing to respond to his pretty friend's body pressed up against his.

Someone grabbed Remus by the arm and spun him away from a shocked Lily to gasps and catcalls from the other students in the Great Hall. Dizzy, Remus didn't have a chance to focus on his friend and explain that he was testing out his sexuality, because James's fist connected with his jaw and sent him spinning away.

Spinning away directly into _gorgeous-irresistible-erotic_ Sirius. His momentum knocked them both onto the bench and Remus fell on top of his friend, his mouth smashed over Sirius's in a purely accidental snog. The gasps and catcalls turned into exclamations and whoops as Remus struggled to get up until Sirius grabbed his hair and yanked him back down. It was safe enough to say that his body certainly responded to his _carnal-hot-arousing_ best friend...if he could even call him that anymore.

MOMENT NUMBER FOUR: Horn Dogs

EMOTION RELEASED: Arousal

TIME AND PLACE: Sixth year, dormitory

REASON FOR EMOTION: _See below_

Remus didn't think it was possible to ever get enough of Sirius. He moaned softly, letting his fingers tangle in Sirius's hair as his boyfriend deepened the kiss and pressed up against him. Lowering one hand to search behind him for the doorknob, Remus let them into the dormitory, both boys laughing breathlessly as they stumbled inside.

"I want you now," Sirius growled, kicking the door closed and tugging at the belt loops on Remus's jeans. Remus made an odd sort of choked, strangled sound as his hips pushed against Sirius's. He pulled back to give his boyfriend a lascivious grin before sinking to his knees, running his hands down the firm body as he went.

He was quick to release Sirius from the confines of his jeans, his fingers well practiced at flicking open the button, his teeth well accustomed to slowly pulling down the zipper. Sirius shuddered and Remus looked up at him, satisfied by the reactions he could elicit from his lover.

"Merlin, Moony!" Sirius gasped, throwing his head back as Remus took him into his mouth at the exact moment when James chose to make an appearance by throwing his bed hangings back to reveal himself and Lily – both fairly dishevelled and in various stages of undress – staring at the scene unfolding before them. Sirius slowly turned his head to stare at them, frozen in his position of holding up his shirt to watch Remus, who was all too aware that he still had an inappropriately full mouth.

"WHAT IN MERLIN'S NAME DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING?" James shrieked suddenly, jumping up to stare at his two friends. Lily sat up, pulling a sheet up absentmindedly to cover up her bra. "Doing…doing _that_ in our dorm!"

"Oh, don't be such a prude, Jamie," Sirius snapped. "Looks like you were about to do the same thing with Evans over there!"

"Yeah, but I wouldn't force you to watch when I go down—"

"Okay." Lily interrupted quickly, clutching the sheet closer.

"Fair point," Sirius smirked. "Sorry, mate. We didn't realise you guys were in here. We normally check, but Moony's just so damned hot I couldn't help myself."

"Don't worry about it," James said cheerfully, before glancing down and then looking pointedly at the ceiling, "Uh, Remus…you do know you've still got…I'm pretty sure my girlfriend's getting off to this, Moony."

Remus snapped out of his frozen, shocked state and turned to look at James. Unfortunately, because his brain shut down when he was horny, he tried to get to his feet without extracting Sirius and surprised himself at the same time by doing so – ending up…well, the nicest way to put it would be that his teeth grazed parts that Sirius probably would have preferred to stay strictly teeth-free.

"OOOOUUUUUCHHHH!" Sirius screamed, darting away from Remus in shock as he clutched at his crotch, "FOR THE LOVE OF—GOOD GOD, REMUS, WHAT THE HELL—OWWWW IT HURRTTTS! James, am I bleeding?"

"I'm not looking!" James cried, shielding his eyes as Lily unsuccessfully tried to stifle her giggles.

"Well _I_ can't look!" Sirius whined. Remus took a step forward, but Sirius glared at him and shooed him away. "You stay away from me, Bitey. I quite like my dick without the missing chunks, thank you very much!"

"I didn't mean—" Remus said quickly, before spitting into his palm and showing it to Sirius, "No blood, see?"

Sirius refused to see, however, and Remus couldn't say he blamed him. For weeks after that moment, things were awkward between the Marauders (Lily was fine, tending to sit and stare between Remus and Sirius for a weird amount of time before disappearing up to her dormitory): James would go pale whenever he laid eyes on either of them and Sirius wouldn't let Remus near his – ahem – person.

Remus blamed himself completely. He was supposed to be the sensible one of the relationship – Sirius would never think to check whether the dorm was actually as empty as it seemed, so was something Remus had been doing since they had gotten together. Never had he been so overtaken with need that he had forgotten himself. _First time for everything, I guess, _Remus thought dejectedly as he poked at his mash potato one night. Something nudged his foot and he looked up to see Sirius waggling his eyebrows suggestively.

Scooting away from his boyfriend quickly, Remus lowered his eyes and desperately hoped that Sirius didn't mean what he thought he meant and had finally gotten over the 'Teeth Scare'. Getting into bed with Sirius could be…risky. The eldest Black brother was known for his lust for revenge.

MOMENT NUMBER FIVE: Doesn't Have to Be Forever

EMOTION RELEASED: Hysteria

TIME AND PLACE: Seventh year, school grounds

REASON FOR EMOTION: _See below_

"I can't believe this is it." Lily sniffed, clinging on to both James's and her father's arms. Remus bit his lip and tried to hold back all the emotion that was flooding through him. He couldn't be compared to a girl. Sure, he was gay – a bloody pink ponce as it went – but he was through with showing emotion like some hormonal woman. Where had emotions gotten him over the years? Nowhere, that's where. Well, if 'nowhere' meant a pit of horrible humiliation and self-loathing. Okay, he knew he was being over-dramatic now, but Remus's inner monologue just wouldn't shut up today.

It was their last day ever as students at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. The leaving ceremony had ended minutes ago and the grounds had filled quickly with students and parents talking to other students and teachers, discussing plans for the future or simply weeping their eyes dry as Lily was doing.

"This isn't 'it'," Peter said in a rare moment of gentleness, laying a hand on Lily's shoulder. "We'll still all see each other. We can floo – and all of us can apparate, now! Except James…but he'll always be hovering below your bedroom window anyway."

Remus, Sirius, James and Lily all blinked at their rotund friend, surprised by his eloquent and kind comments (apart from James, who had more of a confused killmaimecuddle expression at Peter's smooth slight on his behalf). They realised, though, that he was only acting as such due to his parents being present. It was well known that the Mrs Pettigrew believed her son to be innocent of the pranks he had been in detention for and the other Marauders a bad influence on him. Peter played on this as much as possible and the others didn't blame him; he'd gotten a nice owl out of it the previous year.

"You're right, Peter. I'm sorry for acting so pathetic," Lily snuffled, wiping her eyes on James's robes, "I just d-don't want anything to change."

"It's not pathetic to mourn the passing of time," Lily's father smiled down at his daughter as her mother handed her a tissue from her bag. "Remember to look forward to the future whilst you're grieving, though."

"We can have you all over for a portion of the summer, if you don't have places to be," Mr Potter offered kindly.

"Oh, no. We can't put you out like that," Mrs Pettigrew simpered. "We're going to be in Wales with my mother, aren't we Petey?"

Peter scowled when Sirius and James sent him wide grins and nudged each other. Mr and Mrs Potter smiled politely as their children started to make plans for what they could do with their summer as they waited for their N.E.W.T.s results and started to apply for jobs.

"Remus, get a hold on yourself," Mrs Lupin hissed quietly, laying a hand on her son's shoulder.

"Hey Moony," Sirius said with an excited grin as he turned to Remus, not hearing his mother's irate command, "Why don't we—"

"I can't do it," Remus gasped suddenly, throwing himself on Sirius and squeezing his eyes closed, "I can't do it! Oh, Merlin, Lily's right – everything's going to change!"

"Remus, calm down. People are looking," Mrs Lupin shushed, glancing around the packed grounds nervously.

"No, no, noooo!" Remus wailed against Sirius's neck, shaking his head, "You're all going to become astronauts and leave me behind because I can't go to the moon and I'll end up being a babysitter for Padfoot because he can't be bothered to study for tests and I'll spend the rest of my life satisfying a dog's needs but I can't have my life amount to making a bloody dog happy because I studied far too much for that!"

Everyone stared at Remus – the calm one, the sensible one, the reasonable one – as he paused to breathe and hiccup, his face still buried in Sirius' neck.

"Satisfying a dog, hmm? That isn't a euphemism for sex, is it?" Sirius asked with a lifted eyebrow, ignoring the way Mrs Lupin paled. "Why is that something to cry about?" he demanded.

"It can't be much fun when you've got a tiny cock." Lily snickered. Her mother smacked her round the head and hissed at her to behave. Lily flushed and bowed her head, embarrassed.

"I do not have a tiny cock!" Sirius exclaimed in outrage, covering his heart with his free hand, the other one busy patting Remus's back, "And anyway, even if I did it doesn't matter since it's Remus who sticks his—"

"Sirius!" Mrs Potter shouted. No one noticed Mrs Lupin faint and keel over backwards. Even Remus, who was still sobbing against Sirius. "Mind how you talk in front of your elders."

"Sorry, Mrs P." Sirius mumbled sheepishly.

"Is he okay?" Mr Potter asked, frowning at Remus.

"He's getting hysterical," Sirius chuckled, prying Remus's fingers from his robes and leaning back to look his boyfriend in the eye. "There's no need to get so upset," he said gently, ruffling Remus's hair fondly, "You've always got me, right? That'll never change – even Azkaban could never keep me from you, you got that?"

Remus nodded, his eyes red and his brow furrowed. Sirius smiled again and leaned in to kiss him gently. Remus sighed against those soft lips and shifted to get closer, hitting his foot on something that felt, oddly enough, like a body. He ignored it and wrapped his arms around Sirius's neck, relishing in his lover's words and in the fact that yes, they were going to be together no matter what. There was nothing to worry about. Nothing at all.

Well, except for the lack of money. And the possibility that Sirius could meet a nice girl in auror training. And that You Know Who could knock down their doors at any moment and decide to kill them. But other than that, things would be perfectly fine.

The flashes of cameras, like fireworks from behind Remus's closed eyelids, went off across the grounds. He remembered that there were professional photographers walking around being paid to take pictures of the students' last moments at Hogwarts, but for once, he couldn't find it in him to care – couldn't be arsed to care about the parents' tutting and whispering. Letting his apprehension, his joy, his sadness and his excitement take over to form the sweetest form of hysteria he had ever known, Remus deepened the kiss with his constant and hummed happily.

This moment of rare spontaneity was turned against him, however, as when the pictures were sent by owl a week later to their homes, Remus's mother had opened theirs to find a rather shocking photograph. James and Lily were both holding hands and looking the appropriate amount of sad and happy, with their parents on either side. Peter was stood beside his mother and grinning widely. Mrs Lupin was on the ground, but no one but the woman herself really noticed. Sirius and Remus were (typically) the ones who added the shock factor, what with the way they were clinging to each other and appeared to be glued together by their tongues.

"REMUS JOHN LUPIN!" Mrs Lupin hollered up the stairs to her son, who had disappeared to 'write a letter to his friends'. "HOW DARE YOU DISGRACE OUR FAMILY NAME MORE THAN YOU ALREADY HAVE BY ALLOWING YOURSELF TO BE CAPTURED ON FILM WITH ANOTHER BOY'S HAND DOWN YOUR TROUSERS?"

Unfortunately, Remus had long since apparated to the Potters' to see Sirius, so he wasn't around to receive a tongue-lashing about how disgraceful her werewolf son was to her name.

Remus settled down for a few years after that. His emotional outbursts were no longer outbursts and didn't get him into trouble or ridiculous situations. Many would say that he had simply 'grown up', but he had a feeling that as long as he knew the Marauders, trouble would always be around the corner.

**A/N2:** So what did you think? Drop a review and let me know! You never know, you might just get a doughnut for doing so...


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